Honesty

I so want to be honest about everything

that is going on in my life at the moment

but it would be used against me.

Everything I write on here and other

sites is being used against me.

Crocheting and blogging has kept

me going over the last few years.

Getting sick and becoming very disabled

has been hard.

As a mum knowing your son can't do things because of you

is hard. Never mind anything else.

You have all kept me going. Reminding me that no matter

how sick I am I'm still worth something.

I'm seriously ill.  I didn't realise

how serious till I went and saw the dr today.

I knew the lung infection had spread to both lungs.

What I didn't realise is that I was already on the strongest

antibiotics for the condition.

The dr says if this doesn't work he doesn't know

what will help me.

He told me my asthma isn't under control anymore.

I told him about what is going on in the background at

the moment and he told me to forget it.

He said I need all my bodies strength to fight this illness.

He said this is serious!

Yes I'm very scared!

There are also lots of things going on in the background

that I can't tell you about.

I wish I could. You've been here with me through everything.

Crocheting makes me feel worth while.

It takes my mind off the pain, stress and everything else that

goes along with it.

Sitting in a house that is filthy and I can't do anything about

it could send anyone crazy.

Sitting crocheting relaxes me and makes me feel like I'm still worthwhile.

When I design and you love my designs it makes me feel so special!

I have made so many friends in you.

You mean the world to me!

I hope everything in the background gets sorted.

I hope they realise that if it wasn't for my crocheting and blogging

I may not be alive.

I'm not running a business it's my hobby.

I don't make any profit. I try and give as much as I can

to charity. The only problem with a hobby is it costs money.

I've never been in the black.

Blogging and designing has made me feel worthwhile.

This is being used against me

but believe me I am going to keep on blogging.

I'm going to keep on crocheting and hopefully

I'm going to keep on living.

I'm sorry it's such a depressing post but I'm really scared.

I've always tried to tell you the good, the bad and the ugly.

I hope you'll stay with me through this blip.

You all mean the world to me!

You make everything worth while.

Thank You!

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Thursday Handmade Love Week 47

Keeping with the spring is coming & flower theme.

It's also Mothers Day on the 10th March in the UK

and there are some beautiful presents within the selection.

This weeks theme is..................................

Daffodils

Etsy Finds:

  

  

  

Etsy Crochet Patterns:

  

  

  

Ravelry Crochet Patterns for sale:

  

  

Free Ravelry Crochet Patterns:

  

  

  

  

Now it's your turn.

Feel free to link anything handmade.

It doesn't have to follow the theme.

Please where you can add the button to your post.

We want the homemade love to spread.

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What You Doing Wednesday Week 48

Good morning everyone!

Hope your week is going well.

Mine isn't going to plan.

Last Wednesday I started feeling a bit off.

By Friday I found out I had another lung infection.

This time it's in my right lung.

I also have an ear, throat and chest infection

so it's a bit tough at the moment.

I spent the whole weekend on the couch as I struggled 

to walk through lack of oxygen.

Thankfully I'm a bit better.

Still rattling but I can walk from one room to another.

Not much further but each improvement is a plus.

Now to the what I'm making.

I can't wait till Friday!

I'm struggling to sleep and haven't moved much

so I've been crocheting!

I wasn't quite up to designing myself

so I decided to make things from other peoples patterns.

The one thing I did design and isn't quite finished is:

My Spring/Easter Hat.

Yes I know it does look finished 

but I want to put a big daisy at the front where it folds up.

There yellow is actually brighter - more like buttercream.

We have no natural light at the moment so photos aren't brilliant.

I decided to take a look at all the hats I had 

made up as plain hats that need making

into different themes.

Each one is in my head and I know what I want to make.

I just need to get better so I can design them.

I'm so excited for Friday!

This weeks Books:

Audio:

Bram Stokers Dracula

This is another free audio book from booksShouldBeFree

I never realised that although I have watched films

and read other Dracula books but not the original classic.

I'm up to chapter 10 and really enjoying it.

Reading:

      

I've only just started reading it

so I'll let you know more probably next week.

Now it's your turn to share what you are doing.

It doesn't have to be crochet, anything you are making

is perfect.

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What You Doing Wednesday Week 48

Good morning everyone!

Hope your week is going well.

Touch wood we haven't had any dramas with Little Red this week.

He had a bit of an upset tummy at the end of the week last week.

This meant 2 days off school as you aren't allowed in school

for 48 hours after your last symptoms.

I know why they do it but it's a problem when they start complaining

about attendance.

I'm making more legwarmers this week:

I'll tell you all about the pattern on Friday as I'm trying out quite few different pattern designs.

I am also linking up with:

   

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